This week, Hallie and I drew inspiration from our friend Tom Murphy, a former professional MMA fighter who owns the company Sweethearts and Heroes, which sheds light on bullying and has reached over two million students in its message for empathy and empowerment. We talk about why bullying is worse now than ever, and how we as leaders have the duty to notice the small changes in others and get curious about how they really are doing. We discuss what self-bullying is, and how we can help start the conversation with our own children about what to do if they experience being bullied.
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Timestamps
- [2:33] Tom has worked with over two million students in the last six years and works with middle school and high schoolers, along with teachers. He describes the inspiration behind Sweethearts and Heroes.
- [4:50] Why are kids struggling so much these days, compared to how we did in recent generations?
- [6:44] Bullying used to be more individualized, but now with social media, there is no reset button, and people can gang up on each other without the consequences of being face-to-face.
- [7:53] Self-bullying is something even adults do themselves, and that’s even when we have a fully formed adult brain. For developing teens and adolescents, constant self-bullying can quickly take a toll on mental, emotional, and physical health.
- [11:57] Kids can do a good job of masking their emotions, and as a parent, it can be difficult to see that. That is why you have to be constantly engaged.
- [13:38] It’s our duty as leaders to recognize these patterns when people are caught self-bullying themselves.
- [18:36] Once you develop a pattern to recognize the behaviors of others, and get curious about how they are, you must let go of the outcome.
- [20:05] Come from a place of curiosity in your conversation, not ego.
